Blue Read online

  “I think if you can solve the world’s problems by taking a bath, I’ll jump in and never get out.”

  She laughed and placed the new ball on the tray to join the others. “Baths, bath bombs, good-smelling stuff, none of that will solve anything, but at least it can help you get away for a bit. These are scented with gardenia. Too floral for a man like you, but I’ll make a batch with a cedar and lavender scent. More spicy and masculine.”

  He didn’t tell her he didn’t have a bathtub in his apartment and probably wouldn’t use it if he did. “Thanks.”

  She treated him to his favorite smile.

  He fumbled a bit with a bottle of tangerine oil, feeling the need to leave still but not wanting to. The plastic ball mold crunched softly as she pressed it together, the only sound in the room.

  “I’d better leave you to your—uh, bomb making,” he finally said, not able to come up with any other excuses to stay.

  He turned to go.

  “Just a moment, Blue.” He watched as she took off her gloves and wiped her hands on the dishtowel she had draped over her shoulder. She came to stand in front of him and, without hesitation, enfolded him in her arms. He could feel calm, accepting peace coming from her and it nearly sent him to his knees. He inhaled the gentle fragrance wafting from her hair and it was all he could do to not to bury his nose in the soft blonde mass. The unconditional support was something he craved more than air and needed more than water. He gave himself that for a moment, feeling the crush of her breasts against his chest and the brush of her hands as they stroked over his back.

  He pushed her away abruptly, a little rougher than he meant to, and didn’t look at her face as he hardened his own.

  “What are you doing, Psalm?”

  She blinked in surprise at his hard tone. “Um… I was—just giving you a hug.”

  “Why?” The word lashed out like a whip.

  “I—uh, thought you may need one,” she answered, confusion on her face and in her voice. She folded in a bit, crossing her arms in front of herself and holding in whatever she had been offering to him.

  He needed to set some boundaries, mostly for himself. “Right now, I don’t need anything from you but your testimony in court. Might not even need that if I play my cards right. I appreciate your help with my kids, but don’t go reading into something that ain’t there.”

  “I understand, Blue. I really didn’t mean anything other than to give you a hug. I’m sorry. I’ll still be glad to help you with the kids if you need me.”

  Blue felt like a dick. Psalm was such a gentle, giving woman and was only trying to be supportive. He pinched his eyes between his thumb and index finger and let out a huge sigh. “Look, Psalm, I’m sorry I just jumped your shit. I’m really tired and have a lot going on, but it doesn’t mean I should take it out on you. I need as many friends as I can get right now. Can we just leave it at that?”

  Her smile reappeared and she slowly blinked. “Friends is good. I can definitely do that for you. Call me, text me, whatever you need. Deal?”

  “Deal,” he agreed. Suddenly, he was completely drained and ready to fall asleep on his feet. Coming over to Psalm’s place did indeed make him feel calmer and better in control. Maybe her hugs weren’t such a bad idea. He had to leave before he started something he couldn’t finish.

  “Listen, I’m gonna head home. Lock up behind me and don’t stay up too much longer yourself. You’re probably worn out from the weekend, and tomorrow is a workday for both of us. Coffee shop?”

  Her smile got even brighter and Blue’s breath stilled in his chest.

  “Sure thing, Blue. See you later.”

  Blue left and went back to his dismal apartment. The place wasn’t well insulated and there was a chill in the air. He stripped and crawled between the cold sheets, his mind still confused but at least easy enough to sleep. He glanced over at the steadily shrinking bar of soap, picked it up, and inhaled its scent deep into his lungs. He stood up, took the bar into the bathroom, and placed it on the shower shelf before returning to bed.

  Ten

  Monday morning was tough. I only had a few hours of fitful sleep before I had to start my day. After Blue had left, I sat on the counter for a while. Sam had looked up at me with his big gold eyes, his ears forward, asking if I was all right. I was and I wasn’t. I wondered why he didn’t bark or anything when Blue spoke roughly to me. Maybe he thought Blue was the pack alpha?

  Deputy Davis. I have to call him that. He can’t be Blue to me. He has to be Deputy Davis.

  I dragged myself out of bed, more reluctant than ever to get up and start my day. Toto was moving stiffer this morning. Her arthritis was getting worse and there would come a point when the daily pills wouldn’t work anymore to ease her pain. I truly dreaded that time.

  The rest of the dogs were their usual selves, oblivious to the woes of the world and ready to play. It did help my mood to be surrounded by wagging tails and wiggling butts all vying for scratches. Today, I had to set up a meeting with Buddy’s potential family, a set of parents with two young boys who liked Buddy’s patchwork face.

  I went through my routine, but I didn’t look through my window to check for Blue doing his.

  Deputy. Deputy. Deputy, I chanted in my head while I was putting on my makeup for the day, hoping to break the habit of calling him Blue. That was too personal and I needed the distance, especially after last night. I looked down at Sam, who was watching me at my vanity table.

  “Fat chance of that, eh boy?” I said to him, scratching behind a stumpy ear. His response was to open his mouth and pant a bit. He lifted a paw to rest on my hand as if saying “there, there. tiny human.”

  I shook myself. Stop it, Psalm! The man has enough to deal with without you adding an old moony high school crush to the mix. It was a one-time thing a long time ago so enjoy it for that, but don’t add to the man’s burdens by expecting anything more.

  He was at the coffee shop just before I got there and had two coffees in his hands waiting for me. I smiled and took the paper cup with a gentle thank-you. I was thinking of ordering a double espresso shot for the extra caffeine, but I wasn’t going to complain at having a handsome man buy my morning cup.

  “Good morning, Deputy.”

  “Mornin’, Psalm. Thought I said last night you can call me Blue.”

  I took a sip of the delicious brew and let it roll across my tongue. Pam was a coffee master!

  “I think since you’re in uniform, I should probably call you Deputy. I wouldn’t want anyone to get the idea I get preferential treatment.”

  Blue took a sip from his own cup and one corner of his mouth raised. “I’ll still ticket you if you mess up, Psalm, but maybe you’ll pay with somethin’ besides money.”

  My insides quivered at his reply and I was at a loss for words until he opened his mouth again.

  “I may charge you soap bars and those bath things. Christmas is comin’ and I know Mama likes bubble baths.”

  I smiled and dropped my eyes to the floor.

  “Mind if I ask you something personal?”

  His question had me looking up again.

  “How come your parents named you Psalm? I remember you were the only one in high school with that name. It’s nice, but it ain’t common.”

  I smiled. “I don’t mind answering. Mom wanted a Bible name and shuffled through a bunch of them. Esther, Hannah, Naomi, Mary, lots of them but couldn’t choose. When she went into labor with me, she was reading in the book of Psalms and decided it was a sign that was what she was supposed to name me.”

  He drank more coffee and nodded. “Makes sense to me. Unique and pretty-sounding. Suits you.”

  The heat of a blush crept across my face and I dropped my eyes again, making an acknowledging hmm sound.

  “You got stuff to ship?”

  I nodded while taking another healthy swig of my drink. “Every day. Now that I have the website, I get a lot of online business. It’s a pain, but it’s a nice prob
lem to have.”

  He grunted, tilted his head, and swallowed the last of his coffee. I watched his throat work with fascination.

  “Let’s get to it then.”

  With Blue’s help, I made my shipping run and started my work day. Today, I wore maroon leggings, flat-heeled black leather boots, and a long-sleeved printed tunic. I’d brushed my freshly treated hair out and let it hang loose. My makeup was colored to blend in with the colors of my tunic, but I did add a little eye glitter to the mix. A girl needs a little sparkle every now and then. The days were still fairly warm but would be getting colder soon. Tourists would be coming through the area all the way up until New Year’s Eve, which was over three months away, but the main traffic of the season was just about finished.

  I decided it was time to get my Christmas scents ready. Because cold process soap can take so long to fully cure and I usually had a butt-ton of orders to fill, I had to start way ahead and guess on how much of each seasonal soap I needed to make. Some of the stores that bought from me wholesale sent me a list of what they wanted and how much. This helped a lot. Some stores simply ordered what they wanted at the time and reordered when they ran out. This didn’t help any, but so far I’d been able to fulfill all my orders including my own store.

  I was layering thickened soap batter in several ten-pound loaf molds when the bell rang.

  “Welcome to Soap-n-stuff! I’ll be with you in a moment!” I called out.

  “No problem, darlin’. We’re just browsin’ right now, but I need some more of my wrinkle cream.” I closed my eyes and wished I could melt into the floor. It was Betsey.

  Tambre was with her and both women were looking at the newest pottery from a local artist. Tambre had bought several pieces from this collection and said she wanted to add more when the artist fired his next batch. Lucky timing, right?

  “Hi, Betsey, hi, Tambre. I see you found the new stuff. He just finished last week and this lot was brought in a few days ago. Fabulous, aren’t they?” I poured the final layer into the soap mold. This was a popular scent I made year-round, but it sold like hot cakes at Christmas. The scent was a tropical fruity one using mango, coconut, and banana, called Monkey Farts. Kids loved it for the seminaughty name and adults loved the novelty. It really didn’t matter what the appeal was, I just knew how much sold during the holidays and my stock was going down fast. I layered the soap in kind of a banana cream pie look. Brown layer on the bottom, then yellow, then a thin tangerine, then white on top with a fluffed whipped look to it. To further the monkey idea, I piped little bananas and oranges all over the top with soap in a pastry bag. I thought it was cute and my customers did as well. This was the first of twenty pounds I would be making of this particular soap today.

  “You doin’ all right? I heard about Jonelle comin’ in here the other night,” Betsey asked, not waiting but jumping right in. “I wanted to thank you for takin’ care of my grandkids. They’s had it rough lately with their mama and daddy fightin’. I wish I could do more, but Blue’s gotta do his own thing. He’s just as stubborn as his daddy.”

  She picked up a Give Me Your Heart soap that was scented with pikake, jasmine, and a touch of vanilla. The soap had a bright pink heart in the middle and was surrounded by lavender and white layers. Another good seller of mine.

  “Shells told me about this one. Says it’s her favorite. Probably for the pink. That kid’s wild about pink. She’s a tomboy most of the time. Don’t mind gettin’ dirty and roughing around on the four wheelers up at the Lair and such, but loves the girly stuff too.” Betsey sighed as she inhaled the scent and pulled three of the colorful soaps from the bin. I made a mental note to check my stock and put that design in the production lineup this week.

  “Damn shame what them kids is goin’ through,” she continued as she moved to the counter and watched me pipe little orange dots next to the yellow arcs on top of the soap loaf I was working on. Tambre was still looking at the pottery, lifting several pieces to move to the counter.

  “I’m very sorry all this is happening to them. I’m sorry for their daddy and mom, too,” I responded, finishing up the piping and putting the bag to the side to take off my rubber gloves and wipe off my sweaty hands. The gloves were necessary in working with raw soap batter as it was still very caustic and would continue to saponify for the next twenty-four hours. Necessary, but rather uncomfortable.

  “Is that Sam over there?” Betsey asked, lifting and pointing her chin behind me. I turned to see the bulky dog come through the workroom door from the courtyard. He came and stood next to me, peering silently up at the strangers.

  “Yes, this is Sam.” I bent and scratched him behind his ears as he leaned into my legs. “He’s a recent rescue. I guess Cody mentioned him?”

  “Oh Lord, yes! That boy was on the phone this mornin’ talkin’ up a storm about that dog. He forgot all about bein’ scared and waitin’ for his mama at the festival. All he could say was Sam this and Sam that. Shells talked about him too, sayin’ he’s a big one and he done scared Jonelle some.”

  Her eyes went back to the behemoth sitting next to me. “I guess she was right. He’s a little intimidatin’, ain’t he?”

  I laughed lightly. “I suppose he could be, but he hasn’t shown any aggression at all. Well, not to me or anyone else except for Jonelle. I think it was because she was yelling and arguing. He didn’t blink when Blue, um, came by that night.”

  Somehow, I didn’t think I needed to tell Betsey her son had come over late last night as well. I’d told him essentially I would keep his private business private and I intended to do just that.

  “Dog’s a good judge of character,” Tambre said, coming up to the counter and placing three more of the pottery pieces. “That girl has been a bad seed for years.” She was the opposite of Betsey as she didn’t talk a lot. Her demeanor was cotton soft, which was rare for a Dragon Runner old lady, but somewhere in that gentle persona of hers was a hard core of steel. She might not say a lot but when she did, her words held weight. She was buying five pieces of pottery this time and the pottery wasn’t cheap. She must really like it to get so much at one time. The artist would be thrilled.

  Betsey put her soap on the counter as I wrapped the pottery up in protective bubble sheets. “You gonna come set up at the club’s Halloween barbecue, ain’tcha? Got little over a month to finish plannin’ it, but cain’t hurt to start early.”

  I smiled and blinked at her. “I have a vendor table there every year. It’s a great way to kick off the Christmas season and I really appreciate the opportunity. The Dragon Runners do so much for the community, I wish you got more recognition for it.”

  Betsey snorted. “Yeah, well, it would be nice, but that ain’t gonna happen. Too many folks still remember how it was years ago before my Brick took over. Blue’s dealing with this new drug mess in town now and the club is being eyeballed for it. Ain’t no way! Fact of the matter is we want to catch the ones doing this shit just as bad as the sheriff does.”

  Tambre inhaled softly. “That’s club business, Betsey.”

  The red-haired woman flipped her hand up and blew out. “Psssht! Ain’t only club business when the town already knows there’s somethin’ goin’ on.”

  She changed subjects and gestured at the building across the street. “Blue’s living in one of them shithole apartments up there. Lord have mercy, I want him to move so bad. Jonelle got the court to declare he cain’t have the kids overnight ’cause he’s only got one bedroom. Don’t matter, he’d sleep on the floor if he had too. She’s also tryin’ to get the court to say the kids cain’t stay overnight up to the Lair anymore. Say it’s not a ‘safe environment’ at a biker club.” Betsey held up air quotes to match her sarcastic tone. “That ain’t gonna happen. That woman spent time around the club when she and Blue were together and knows it’s one of the safest places to be for a kid. The boys get rowdy and they do party, but not when kids are around. Now Blue’s headin’ back to court again, fighting just to keep what
little time he gets. Damn that bitch! Blue won’t take no money from Brick and me to help out. He’s such a stubborn little shit sometimes!” she declared, looking at the ugly brick façade. Her tone softened. “I wish he would. He’d give up his last dime to take care of them kids. Don’t have many men like that no more. My boy works hard and deserves to be treated right.”

  I wasn’t sure why Betsey was laying it out to me, but I felt the older woman needed an ear. Sometimes people don’t want answers, they just want someone to listen. I can do that.

  Her voice broke a little and her eyes grew moist. “You know, he and his daddy had a little falling out over him wanting to be a law officer. Kinda goes against the grain for a Dragon Runner to be a deputy, don’t it? Well, Blue didn’t join up to spite his daddy. Brick has been the president and leader of the club for over thirty years now and he’s not stepping down till he’s drooling in a wheelchair or the good Lord takes him home. If Blue stayed in the club, he’d always be second to his daddy and that didn’t sit too well with him. Blue’s just like Brick, born to be a leader and protector. He’s dancing to Jonelle’s tune only because he has to for his kids’ sake, but I know it’s hard on him. Hard enough, I’m afraid he’s gonna break.”

  This time a real tear flowed down Betsey’s cheek. Blue wasn’t the only one who was on the verge of breaking. My heart clenched at the sight. “Blue is a good man, Betsey, and one I’m grateful to have working for us in this town. I’ll be glad to stand up for him in court if he needs me to say what I saw during the festival. He already knows that and if it helps him or the kids, I’d be honored.”

  Betsey dashed her red-tipped fingers under her eyes. “Thank you for helpin’ him an’ the kids out, Psalm. You’re a good woman.”

  I nearly choked. I disguised the sound by ringing up Tambre’s purchase and smiling at the total. “I think you just made this artist’s day. Thank you so much for supporting him.”